Posted by Thandie.
Eve Ensler’s ‘Man Prayer’ has been described as being “for all men” and those behind the film say: “we hope all of you will watch it and share it with every man you know”. Every time I see Man Prayer I’m reminded of the power that comes from unity between men and men, and women and men.
I’m reminded of the strength that comes from vulnerability, and truth. One certainly leads to the other.
Oh the beauty of tenderness and vulnerability! The idea that tenderness is ‘weak’ holds no water.
In fact, allowing truth to be the motivation for action creates a force stronger than any more complex plan of attack! The simplicity of truth will always be more powerful than fabrication, control, intimidation and so on. To accept ourselves as we are, and to love ourselves for that, liberates us from the insecurity that so often prompts us to compete and condemn.
But this artificial state of domination requires constant application, otherwise the natural state of balance will reveal itself. It’s been so long since any majority has enjoyed ‘balance’ that it’s impossible to imagine ourselves living that way.
But we do what we can. One Billion Rising grows every year – it’s our call to (peaceful) action, and our demand for awareness that ONE IN THREE women will suffer violence at the hands of men in her lifetime (an official UN statistic). That’s ONE BILLION women, on our planet, right now.
Eve wrote Man Prayer after meeting Gyalwang Karmapa at TED India, and was inspired by his commitment to the 1 Billion Rising movement. Eve then turned the prayer into a film with filmmaker Tony Stroebel. It’s the perfect gift to share with fathers, grandfathers, sons, husbands, boyfriends and friends. It could be the start of someone’s own desire to create balance, truth, peace, love.
“Man Prayer” – words by Eve Ensler, film by Tony Stroebel.
Eve has adapted her shattering and magnificent book ‘In The Body of the World’ into a play. It premieres at The American Repertory Theatre – watch the trailer here:
Post by Kay
In the last ten years young men in particular have really embraced the whole male grooming thing. Call it ‘equality’, but they’ve been getting used to what us ladies have been enduring for centuries: the pressure to conform to a narrow physical archetype.
With Men’s Health magazine-type magazines featuring 8-packed men being ‘happy and confident-looking’ on their covers, and gorgeous men with equally gorgeous admirers advertising skincare/hair products to match their fantastic lifestyles, the pressure is ON for men to look as good on our arm, as we have felt the pressure to look good enough to get on theirs since, erhm, forever.
And just like us, they can be on both ends of the spectrum in the form of un-groomed, or overly groomed.
For me, being (*insert loud, distracting cough*) what is often called a woman of a certain age/middle-aged, grooming has become more about psychological and physical maintenance rather than anything else. If I’m totally honest, I now vacillate between ‘finally being with the wisdom of my true self’, and my feeling as though I’m clinging onto the last remains of my ‘looks’ as I enter the ‘invisible years’.
When I was younger, especially as a Londoner growing up in post-punk Britain, I felt absolutely no pressure to conform. In fact, I felt more (internal) pressure to be as unusual as possible, and luckily, the whole perfunctory removal of all body hair had not made it past the porn industry and into the adolescent, putty-like psyche of 1980’s girl-time. Female punks had just liberated us with their visible underarm hair, and guess what Millennials? Pubic hair was not seen as disgusting-imagine!
Being a pre-millennial, I grew up with the dubious archetype of ‘men being men’ whatever that means. Although I’d never deny that looks count, I learnt that an obviously vain man was simply not ‘manly’. The idea of fighting for the mirror in the bathroom with a man was just a no-no. Clean? Sure. Manicured? Just no.
But how things have changed. Years ago, if a man had clearly plucked his eyebrows, and was not wearing a wig and make-up, you’d think he was an off-work drag queen out doing his errands without wanting any fuss and bother, the only giveaway being those two perfectly defined arches about his eyes. Now of course, you have straight men everywhere with the eyebrows of a Kardashian.
And it happens with hairlines too: the reshaping of the hairline. Overenthusiasm in both of these departments, whether you’re a guy or a girl, can give a slightly unbalanced or odd appearance. To some degree, we’ve all been there- to the land of body dysmorphia, personally I will always look far fatter than I am, and now that I’m of a ‘certain flipping age’, in weaker moments I’ve added ‘looking older than I am’ for an added scab of self-criticism to pick upon. Many of us have stuff like that to work on which distracts us from being happy and getting on with the art of living.
So as long as we are investigating where our impulses to ‘self-correct’ come from, and we are working on being kinder, more accepting and loving of ourselves, and focus more on finding fulfillness via enriching experiences with others and nurturing rather than correcting, then our exterior selves can become something we make the best of, and rather like your home, as a reflection of our attitude, a contentment with who you are, and of self-care.
Men, we love your maleness, we love you with hair, and we love you even when there’s not so much of it on your head anymore. But like us ladies, hair tends to grow in some strange ‘ol places as we get on! So if you have some unwanted guests of a follicle nature growing out of your nose and ears, these trimmers make an ideal gift!
This gift idea is inspired by my boyf, who’s got the whole short, (non-hipster size FYI!) right-amount-of-got-out-of-bed-ness beard going on. He uses a trimmer. So how about this Philips Norelco QT4070 Vacuum Beard, Stubble and Mustache Trimmer Pro? It has a very long name so it must be good right?
You could be the kindest, hottest looking, most interesting and intelligent man, but if the shoes come off and you have the soles and toes of a neglected Elephant in dry season…well let’s just say a little something could be done about that. Thandie LOVES her footfiler, don’t get her started on how much satisfied she is with it. It’s the little things. Her’s one especially for MEN. It must have a much more butch action or something, you must need more strength to use it, isn’t that right ladies! The Micro Pedi MAN Rapid Hard Skin Remover by Emoji